Bearsharks

While they are unquestionably apex predators, capable of bringing down large prey items with ease, Bearsharks are predominantly foragers. Their ingenuity, combined with their hearty appetite, dictates that they will range far and wide in search of suitable sustenance.

Here we see the BearShark attempting to eat a house cat.

While it’s true that your Bearshark is excellent at finding food and satisfying his hunger, the foodstuff they select for themselves may not always be what’s best for their health. It is entirely possible that your Bearshark, left to his own devices, will consume an entire box of Toffiffee, a bag …

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I am dating one of the loveliest people on the planet. He’s funny and warm and brilliant and talented, and treats me incredibly well. He is also a total weirdo with many emotions. In other words, he is perfect.

My boyfriend, you see, is not just a boyfriend. He is a Bearshark, one of those very rare and ferocious creatures that roam the wilds of Canada, (if by “roam,” you mean screaming in a band, watching MMA and copyediting). As one of the highly privileged few who has had the opportunity to be a Bearshark Handler, I have begun to put together …

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